


Hotel Hell

by AsagiStilinski



Series: YOI Spooky Week 2019 [3]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Angels & Demons, Alternate Universe - Demons, Alternate Universe - Heaven, Alternate Universe - Hell, Angel Otabek Altin, Character's Name Spelled as Viktor, Character's Name Spelled as Yuri, Christophe Giacometti & Victor Nikiforov Friendship, Christophe Giacometti is a Good Friend, Demon Victor Nikiforov, First Dates, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Humor, Implied/Referenced Torture, Katsuki Yuuri is So Done, Long-Haired Victor Nikiforov, M/M, Mafia Yuri Plisetsky, Misunderstandings, Stripper Katsuki Yuuri, Victor Nikiforov Has No Chill, Victor Nikiforov is Extra, Yuri Plisetsky is a Brat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-26
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2021-01-06 05:10:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21221111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsagiStilinski/pseuds/AsagiStilinski
Summary: Viktor, the Prince Of Hell, has decided to open a hotel to rehabilitate sinners so that they can humanely decrease Hell's populationYuri is his first customer, the problem is.... Yuri doesn't know why he's in hell to begin withOr: The loosely-based Hazbin Hotel AU that nobody asked for





	Hotel Hell

**Author's Note:**

> YOI Spooky Week day 2- "The underworld/demons"
> 
> The premiere of Hazbin Hotel is up, you guys should go watch, it's incredible!

"Oof! I'm sorry!"

Wincing, Viktor stepped out of the way... only to bump into yet another person as he stepped across the street

"S-Sorry!"

He turned, backing into someone else and hissing

"Excuse me..."

He took a few steps towards the bar and was then shoved out of the way...

And that was about it

"Watch it!" he snarled, his previously beautifull features quickly flashing demonic- his eyes turning red, his teeth becoming long pointed fangs and his tongue turning slender and forked, long curved black horns perching above his long silver hair and claws jutting out of his fingers, his hair even flaring out behind him like a little windstorm of silver fire

But the bastard didn't care, as was the typical reaction down here in hell

Irritably, his mood now officially spoiled even worse than it had been before, he marched into the bar, relieved to see it was free and clear other than the bartender who he had come to see in the first place

"Chriiiiiiiissssss," he sighed loudly, his entire chest heaving as he plopped down on one of the stools, slumping over the counter like the puddle of misery he was, the cool wood feeling nice against his warm skin as he rubbed his cheek against it

"I hate life- or.. unlife, whatever the heaven this is,"

"Overpopulation got you down again Vitya?" Chris asked casually as he cleaned another glass and set it down in front of him

Viktor didn't know why he bothered, it wasn't like anyone here even cared if the glasses were clean or not, but he suspected it was just a way to bide his time until the evening rush began

"I hate it!" Viktor groaned, his fingers curling into his hair as he gave the long silver strands a small tug, jerking his head up in annoyance

"I don't think it's been this wildly overpopulated since the crusades!"

"How would you know? You didn't even exist back then," Chris pointed out

"I.... read!" Viktor huffed back, putting a hand delicately against his chest as if offended by the idea that he didn't know his history

He didn't, for the most part, but he was still offended that Chris just _assumed_ it

"But I do remember the good old days when it wasn't _this_ bad, you know it wasn't _too_ long ago when you could actually take a piss down here without hitting someone with it,"

Viktor was exaggerating... but not by much

"I don't understand it! We hit a period where our numbers were really at an all time low, and now it's worse than ever! What the fuck are the mortals DOING up there!?"

"Darling, celestials have been asking that question for ages," Chris noted as he set a shot glass down in front of Viktor and reached for a bottle

"I don't care, it's about time we start clearing out this shithole! I'm tired of not being able to breathe without inhaling somebody's personal odor!"

"That's a little extrem-"

"I want to BREATHE Christophe!!" Viktor shouted, his hands slamming down on the counter as he hopped up in his seat, nearly standing as he huffed and watched Chris pour a brightly shimmering opaque white liquid into the glass

"I get it Vitya, in case you've forgotten, I've been here since before you were a _thought_, you don't think I miss the sixties? Damn that was a nice time," he noted

"But there's nothing we can do about it since we've had to cut back on the reincarnation coupons, once these idiots figured out that they had a chance at a clean slate with reincarnation, they started cashing in on that like rats slamming down on an 'orgasm' button, there's a reason we had to install the limiter,"

Sighing heavily, Viktor sank back down into his seat, his expression solemn as he stared at the shot in front of him with trepidation

Yes, he remembered it well

Viktor had only been a kid when they had installed the limiter but the uproar had been one of the worst battles in the history of hell according to his uncle

Reincarnation always allowed clean slates for any soul- good or bad, Heaven-sent or hell-bound, it didn't matter, they started over, and it gave sinners the chance to clear their filthy pasts and move on to Heaven after that life was finished

Naturally, anyone who didn't exactly enjoy hell- wich was mostly everyone- jumped on that chance as soon as word got out about it and what had once been something that came around naturally based on a carefully organized system of term sentences and population growth turned into utter chaos as there was a mass exodus of sinfull souls making their ways back to the mortal realm

Hell was still feeling the burn from that as evil soul after evil soul continued to commit atrocious sins and get themselves sent back to hell as well as a small truckload of causalities they'd afflicted along the way

Heaven had sent down the order to install a limiter on how many hell-bound souls could reincarnate per day or else a war would be launched on hell, and honestly, Viktor's father hadn't needed to be told twice

Although he was always eager to stir shit up with the holy forces, he himself had been more than a little overwelmed by the sudden booms hell was experiencing and had used the opportunity to ease his own work just as much as Heaven's

But ever since, the population in hell had been building up more and more, and Viktor had _had_ it

Picking up the shot glass, he tossed back the liquid inside and hissed loudly as it burned it's way down his throat

"Fuck..... fuck.. damn..." he winced quietly, his claws breifly flashing out and scratching into the counter as a rush of euphoria washed over him better than any orgasm he could ever imagine experiencing

Angel Grace may burn like a motherfucker on the way down, but the pleasure that came from it after settling was damn near _blinding_

No wonder it was kept exclusively for those like Viktor who could handle it and had the money to back it up too

Any part of angels was considered a delicacy down here, but the Grace?

There was _nothing_ like a good shot of Grace

"I just can't take it anymore Chris, I just can't! We have to do something about this shit!"

"And what do you suggest we do? Rehabilitate the sinners?" Chris snorted with a roll of his eyes, taking Viktor's glass and licking the inside of it- not for any remnants of Grace, but for remnants of Viktor's saliva, wich was... uncomfortable, but Viktor was used to it by now

It was one of Chris' _Things_ and he had really stopped caring about it ages ago

Besides, his focus was on something much more important than Chris trying to consume all traces Viktor left behind like a depraved and starving stalker- the blonde had just given him a GREAT idea

"That's it..." he breathed steadily, slowly rising to his feet

"Chris!! That's it!! We'll rehabilitate them!!!"

"Um... what?"

"We'll turn it into a hotel!!!"

Standing up on his barstool, Viktor puffed out his chest and held his hands out to his sides, his features flashing demonic again

"_Hotel Hell_!!!"

"N-No Viktor...."

"YES!" Viktor practically hissed, his forked tongue slithering out like a snake's as he suddenly hopped onto the bar and snapped his clawed fingers

Oh great, now there was music playing

"It'll be PERFECT!! I'll go down in history for the _KING_ that I am, Heaven will finally recognize my greatness, we'll help people, and best of all I'll get some _fucking **PEACE**_!!"

There was a burst of silver fire alongside Viktor's high-heeled feet, and Chris just shook his head

"Think about it Christophe! There are no downsides!!!"

"Oh there are plenty of those mon cheri`..."

Turning on his heel, Viktor carefully moved down to his nees and cupped Chris' face, his features having returned to the human guise he usually preferred to wear

"Chris, is it really so wrong that I genuinely want to help people move on from this terrible place? Is it horrible of me to want to decrease the population of this damned prison?"

"That depends Vitya, is it the anti-social you speaking right now, or the do-gooder you?"

Viktor pursed his lips, seeming to think about that for a moment

"The do-gooder this time, I think,"

"Then no..." Chris admitted with a reluctant sigh, his shoulders sagging as he stared into Vitkor's sad blue eyes

"I guess it isn't a bad thing, it's... a _weird_ thing for the literal son of Satan, but bad? No darling, it isn't bad,"

"Good," Viktor sighed softly, his expression turning into a bright smile once again

"Then you'll help me?"

"Ahh.... do I really have a _choice_?" Chris hissed

Viktor beamed, his features breifly flashing demonic again

"As my right-hand demon? Nope!!"

"Then I guess that's a yes," Chris muttered blandly, already not looking forward to the humiliation this was about to bring on

Not because he personally had any problem with humiliation, but because this was going to reflect horribly on Viktor's already poorly stained reputation and he didn't want his best freind to go through that

Viktor, the _actual Prince Of Hell_, was mostly seen as a joke, despite his father's best efforts, and the more Viktor tried to be "good", the more the other residents of this place tore him apart for it

Viktor was gentle and kind, he had a heart made of gold and glass, and he didn't belong here, just because of his fathers' transgressions....

It destroyed Chris to see Viktor constantly suffering, but he had tried over the years to convince Viktor to follow him down the path of darkness and it never worked, so at this point, he had just given up, because really, what else could he possibly do?

Viktor beamed, wrapping an arm around Chris' shoulders as he moved his other hand up to span against the air in front of them, as if he were trying to show Chris a timeshare or a fixer-upper

"Just think about it Christophe! Soon, we could be the heros of hell!! We'll go down in history for this!!!"

Oh they'd go down in history alright....

That was exactly what Chris was afraid of......

~+~

_"That's why we're going to open a hotel for rehabilitation! If you're interested in getting your soul cleansed and purifying yourself, if you have any wishes to go to Heaven, come join us here!"_

The prince had lost his mind

Yuri really didn't keep up with politics, he wasn't that familiar with the Prince Of Hell, other than the fact that he was apparently pretty eccentric, but watching the commercial currently airing on the TV in front of him, Yuri had decided once and for all that Prince Viktor really had lost whatever sanity he may have once possessed

_"I mean really, what do you have to lose? You're already in hell, it can't get worse!!"_

Well, he did have a point

"Do you believe this shit?"

Yuri glanced up at his boss as Georgi poured him another shot of tequila, shaking his head slowly and heaving a sigh

Now the prince was singing some sort of upbeat bubblegum pop garbage about how he could "cure" sinners

Yuri would like to see him _try_

No, really, he legitimately would like to see him try

Yuri had been in hell for five years now and _still_ didn't know why

He had been pretty devastated at first, to find out that the life he had lived before- one he had always considered to be pretty clean and even boring- had somehow landed him in _hell_, but at this point he was past trying to figure it out and had just come to the "disgruntled acceptance" part of greif about it

Tossing back the shot, he sighed loudly at the resignation that settled over him once again

He would never end up in Heaven and he knew it, why bother letting himself believe otherwise?

_"Did I mention that the first ten volunteers we get for our Sin Rehabilitation Program will get **ten** gold tokens?"_

Yuri, who had been about to request another shot, suddenly froze

"D-Did he say..... _gold_....?" he breathed quietly

"Sounded like it to me," Georgi replied, glancing down at his watch

"You'd bet-"

"TEN GOLD TOKENS!?"

Georgi winced, jerking back and glaring at Yuri in annoyance as he suddenly sprung out of his seat and jumped to stand on top of the stool

"Ten... gold.... tokens...."

Hell had currency- because ofcourse it did, because money was the root of all (well, most) evil and ofcourse the devil fucking _loved it_ and loved the anger and violence that was sparked by the power imbalances it caused

There were three types of tokens a person could earn- bronze, silver, and gold

The bronze tokens were the most common, that's what Yuri earned by stripping at the club every night, and they could be used to purchase treats and privileges, much like in the mortal realm- they were mostly used to acquire goods that were common in hell like drinks and drugs and the like, but if enough of them were saved, you could trade them in for a few silver tokens, wich could be used to import things to hell that weren't naturally found there

But gold?

Gold couldn't get traded up for

Gold could only be earned or given as a gift from high ranking demons, because _gold_ could be your ticket out of here

Gold tokens could buy anything, and they could import _almost_ anything with the only exception Yuri knew of being other souls, but much more importantly than that, gold coins could be used to buy a Reincarnation Coupon

Coupons were only available through gifts given by the _highest_ ranking demons, lotteries, or through purchase

Ten gold coins would buy him a coupon....

And if he reincarnated....

He'd get another shot at life, and even more importantly, another shot at the _after_life

It could be his ticket to Heaven, a free do-over, and there were no downsides!

Either Prince Viktor _wasn't_ crazy and he really did get redeemed and sent to Heaven, or he _was_ crazy and paid Yuri enough to reincarnate and get a do-over

Either way... he was getting out of here....

"Get JJ to take my shift!!" Yuri shouted as he suddenly jumped down from his barstool and rushed out of the bar

"H-Hey! You didn't pay for that drink!" Georgi called in a huff, but it was too late, Yuri was already gone

Grumbling to himself, Georgi shook his head and snatched the glass up, eyes flicking up to the TV as the Prince Of Hell continued speaking

_"So join us next month on our opening day, Friday the 13th!!"_

...

Oh, they weren't open yet

Yuri was going to go all that way and get turned down

Maybe Georgi should go after him?

...............

Pft, why the heaven would he do _that_?

~+~

"I want it to look like the hotel from _Angel_!!!" Viktor sighed dreamily, his fingers clutched against his chest as he watched the workers work on constructing the front entrance of the hotel

"Personally I think it'd look better if we modeled it after the one from American Horror Story," Chris mused plainly as he stared at the giant blinking sign that was about to be lifted onto the top of the building

Viktor gasped, his eyes sparkling as he clapped in excitement, practically jumping up and down

"Ooh you're right Christophe! That _is_ better!!"

"See? Do I kno-"

"I'M HERE FOR THE TRIALS!"

Blinking at eachother in surprise, Viktor and Chris slowly turned around and stared at the man standing in front of them, his chest heaving, evidently having run all the way here from wherever he had been before, and... that was quite a distance if his disheveled appearance had anything to say about it

"I-I'm here for.... to be.... rehabilitated....?"

Silence, for a beat, before Chris spoke up

"Actually, we aren't open just ye-"

"Shush Chris!" Viktor said quickly, holding his hand up to cut Chris off from his words as he swept over to where the stranger was standing, an arm wrapping around the stranger's shoulders as he hugged him close, much to the other man's evident discomfort

"I, Prince Viktor, am MORE than happy to help you, my lovely little sinner!!"

Unimpressed, Chris cleared his throat and made his way over to Viktor, who looked not unlike a wolf who had spotted a fat and limping moose and couldn't wait to sink his teeth in

Great

"Um.... Vitya? Might I remind you that the construction on the hotel has only just begun? Even _you_ can't build an entire hotel in a few hours," he noted under his breath, glancing down at the stranger, who was staring at Viktor the way mice probably stared at snakes

... Yuck, he needed to stop with these mental images...

"Oh don't worry, I can handle _one_ guest to start with," Viktor chuckled lowly, his features flashing demonic for just the _shortest_ of moments before he stared down at the little sinner in his arms

"What's your name cutie-pie?" he practically purred

"Y-Yuri.... Yuri Katsuki...." the brunette replied quietly, clearing his bangs out of his face shyly and adjusting his glasses

...

Wow, how did something _that_ timid end up down _here_...?

"_Yuuuuurrriiiii_~" Viktor sighed dreamily, the way teenage girls probably sighed about their favorite boy bands

"What a lovely name!!"

Chris shook his head slowly, gently but firmly taking Viktor by the shoulder and steering him away from the little mouse of a man for a moment

"Vitya, you do know that hell already _has_ Tindr don't you? If you're going to use this bullshit hotel as an excuse to hook up-"

"I'm not!!"

"-then you could have just _told_ me that, I would have been _much_ more on board-"

"But I'm NOT though!!" Viktor insisted

"It isn't my fault that our first client is cute, ok? But I promise, I'll keep this entirely professional!"

"Really? Because you seriously look like you're about to devour him...."

"I would never!!" Viktor gasped, clutching his chest in offense

"I meant sexually but yeah, I figured that,"

"Oh sexually," Viktor hummed, giving a small "huh" as he stared back over at Yuri

Chris _swore_ he could almost see Viktor drooling

"I'm not saying I'm _not_ going to fuck his brains out," Viktor said off-handedly, as if he were talking about the weather- wich was pretty typical for hell

"I'm just saying I'm going to make sure he's on the path to redemption first,"

"Sure you are," Chris snickered, shaking his head and sighing loudly

"Alright then Playboy, you go set up your first round of sinner-therapy with your new centerfold, count on me to take care of the hotel,"

Viktor, who was usually the type to always want to do everything himself, grinned animatedly and gave Chris two thumbs up before sprinting back to Yuri and brushing his hair behind his ears, bowing up his chest with an inhale, as though he were trying to radiate rainbows and glitter instead of damnation and hellfire, and smiled brightly at the timid little man

"Ok cutie, let's get you signed up, and you can tell Prince Viktor what you did that was oh so terrible to cause you to take the _southern_ route to the afterlife, hm?" he cooed

"That's just it," Yuri said slowly, wringing his hands in front of him anxiously, refusing, for the moment, to meet Viktor's eyes

"I... I don't know what I did...."

Viktor paused, blinked, and tilted his head

"..... Come again?"

"I-I don't ... actually know what I'm doing down here, I can't remember ever committing a sin, I don't know what I'm dong here.... can you.... please still help me? Please? I'm desperate...."

Ofcourse, Viktor noted with a wince

_Ofcourse_ his first client would be the absolute hardest kind of sinner to redeem- the kind who didn't think they'd done anything wrong in the first place

But.... but he was so damn _cute_ and Viktor was a hell of alot of things but a quitter was _not_ one of them

"Yuri," he said with seriousness, wrapping an arm around Yuri's shoulders again and pulling him into his chest

"You have my word, I'll help you, I'll give you all the absolution you can handle, and with my guidance, we'll make a saint of you yet!"

Chris just shook his head from afar, face-palming quietly

"Oh I just _know_ this is going to end terribly...."

And probably in murder

~+~

Meanwile, Yuri Katsuki wasn't the only soul confused about his placement in the afterlife

Quite the opposite, in fact

Up in Heaven, there was another Yuri who was equally confused about how he had ended up where he was

Yuri Plisetsky, former mob boss, found himself lounging across a bench in one of the _many_ gardens of Heaven, lazily watching butterflies flutter through some lilies across from him

.....

_Lovely_

"Fuck this is boring,"

Not only did Yuri not understand how in the hell he ended up in Heaven after spending his relatively short life stealing and murdering, but he also didn't understand how _this place_ was supposed to be paradise

Yes it was very pretty and there were plenty of "pure" and "beautifull" things around, but he just didn't get what all of the fuss was about

"Then why don't you do something else?"

Glancing up, the blonde felt his face turn a light shade of pink as he took in the sight of the man hovering over him

He was.... _gorgeous_, with black hair, brown eyes, and a firm, square jaw

....

_And he was wearing **leather**_

.....

_Wow_

"And do what, instead?"

"Whatever you want?" the stranger snorted, gently nudging Yuri down a little so he could sit on the bench next to him

"This is Heaven, in case that escaped you, the entire point is to be free and do whatever you want,"

"Yeah well what I like to do isn't very _heavenly_, no offense, but I'm not really the 'harps and butterfly gardens' _type_,"

The stranger was quiet for a moment, an eyebrow slowly raising before he spoke again

".......You skipped orientation, didn't you?"

"I-.... _maybe_...."

"Figures.... yeah, there's _alot_ more to Heaven than just that shit,"

"Really?" Yuri asked in surprise, slowly sitting up

"Like what?"

"Name something,"

"......Horror movies,"

"Got it,"

".....Professional fighting?"

"Got it,"

"Smoking?"

"Got it,"

"Sex?"

"Got it,"

Yuri was.... _stunned_.... to put things mildly

"But... none of that is... you know.... _heavenly_...."

"Heaven isn't exactly the Catholic school mural that mortals often believe it to be, or did you not realize that when you learned you could say 'fuck' up here?"

....

Ok he had a point

"Yeah ok but _sex_ though?"

"Sex isn't a sin, I STILL don't know when humans started thinking it was, that's just stupid... you realize that sex was invented for procreation right? God literally invented sex as a _necessity_,"

"Y-Yeah but.... is it supposed to be... fun?"

"Would it feel good if it wasn't?" the stranger replied flatly

.....

Wow, Yuri had never even thought about it like that

"Point taken.... so what IS outlawed up here then?"

"Not much really, besides things like violence and murder,"

"R-Right...." Yuri said slowly

"Want to see what else this place has to offer?" the stranger suggested, standing up and offering his hand down to Yuri

The blonde grinned a little, nodding and reaching up to carefully curl his fingers around the other man's

"Yeah... yeah I am, what's your name anyhow?"

"Otabek,"

"Otabek...." Yuri breathed softly, feeling an oddly... _warm_ feeling in his heart as Otabek started leading him through the garden, and over to-

"Oh holy shit is that a MOTORCYCLE!?"

Otabek chuckled, smirking down at Yuri

"Boy do you have alot to learn,"

"Good thing I've got such a cute teacher then huh?" Yuri grinned back

"Yeah," Otabek smirked, grabbing a helmet off of the bike and handing it to Yuri

"I guess it is,"

~+~

"Assault?"

"No,"

"Battery?"

"No,"

"...Did you step on a puppy?"

"What? NO!"

Viktor frowned, pursing his lips, before...

"AHA! I know! You're homophobic!"

"I'm _bisexual_, asshole," Yuri snapped back, scrubbing his hands along his face tiredly

".... That _would_ complicate matters....."

"Viktor, I'm telling you," Yuri said with exhaustion, staring across the desk at the demon with a truly tired and frustrated expression

"I have not committed _ANY_ sins, atleast none of the ones that I've heard are _real_ sins, sure I've.... cursed and had... impure thoughts but... but I never even lost my virginity!"

Viktor's mouth popped open, forming a small "o" shape at that information

Oh.... _oh_ there were so many things Viktor wanted to do with that information......

And he wanted to do them on the bed and over the desk and against the wall and on live TV....

_Damn_

"N-No those.... things wouldn't get you sent to hell," Viktor sighed softly, elbows on his desk as he slowly let his face plop down into his palms

What constituted "sins" was actually alot smaller of a spectrum than mortals often perceived it to be

Basically the only things that would get you sent to hell were unjust murder, sexual assault, hate crimes, and crimes against animals....

Not only did Yuri not have any of _that_ going on, but he was the cleanest person Viktor had ever met

....

It was almost disconcerting

"Well......... maybe you just don't remember them," Viktor suggested, leaning back in his desk chair and tapping his chin thoughtfully

"... Excuse me?"

"Maybe you blacked out and did shit, maybe you actually have another personality or something that takes over and commits atrocities wearing your meat suit,"

".....I don't think that-"

"Do you have any other explanations for how such a boy scout ended up in hell?"

".......No,"

"Then that's the option we'll explore next," Viktor said, standing up suddenly

"And how exactly are we going to explore that? I... ask hesitantly...." Yuri winced

Viktor grinned then, his features _almost_ shifting demon, grinning, his teeth and eyes beginning to turn, but he reined it back in quickly enough

"Oh, trust me my darling," he chuckled, opening his desk drawer and pulling out a pair of latex gloves, pulling one on with a snap and smirking darkly down at Yuri

"I have my ways,"

As if to further punctuate that, he added the other glove, then reached in and.... grabbed a circular electric bone saw

......

Yuri hated his life

~+~

"Wow, that... that was AMAZING,"

To say that Yuri Plisetsky was now enjoying Heaven was definitely putting it mildly

He was having a BLAST

He couldn't remember the last time he had had so much fun!

He had been in Heaven for years now and had never thought to explore much beyond the shit he usually came across

It turned out that he had somehow just ended up in the Nature Lovers section, but there was so much _more_ to Heaven than just roses and humming birds, he and Otabek had just spent all day proving that

He chuckled a little as he hugged his tiger cub closer- how cool was THAT? He could have an actual, real tiger cub for a pet!!!

Otabek had won her for Yuri at a carnival

Yuri was naming her Potya

"That... that was the best day I've ever had," he said honestly as he slowly stepped off of the moterbike

"I'm glad you had a good time," Otabek smiled peacefully back

"I did too, I had.... a great time, actually,"

"You did?" Yuri asked excitedly

"I did, and I would love to do it again some time, maybe tommorrow I can take you on the thrill-seeking paths,"

"S-Sure!! That sounds great!!"

Visions danced through Yuri's head of shark diving and jumping through rings of fire and bungee jumping....

Now _that_ sounded like fucking _PARADISE_

"I'd love to stay with you longer, but I've gotta head to work," Otabek noted a second later, much to Yuri's surprise

"Work?" he echoed

"Yeah, I'm an angel, didn't I tell you?"

..................

No

_No_, Yuri Plisetsky, ex mob boss, most certainly would have remembered being told that he had spent the day with an _angel_

What the _fuck_!?

"Um... no.... you didn't...."

"Oh," Otabek hummed, shrugging casually as if it was no big deal

_It was a **very** big deal_

"Well, I'll see you tommo-"

"W-Wait a second!" Yuri shouted, causing Otabek to pause- thankfully

"So uh... let me ask you something.... from an angelic perspective.... you said earlier that stuff like unjust murder was sin.... so if somebody committed a bunch of those.... why would they still end up in Heaven?"

He figured, if he had an angel in front of him who clearly liked him, then he might as well ask

"They wouldn't," Otabek replied flatly

And that... sounded very _permanent_

Otabek clearly hadn't left any extra room for "maybe"s and "if"s with that one

"O-Oh..."

"But I wouldn't worry about that, you're safe here Yura, take a breath and relax, and besides, even if someone like that HAD somehow managed to get here, I'd protect you from them,"

With nothing more than a wink, Otabek took off again, leaving Yuri standing outside of his apartment with a nauseated feeling in his gut

Just as he was getting ready to turn around and go in-

"Oh, hi Yuri!"

Spining on his heel, Yuri glared at the man who had just exited the apartment building

His name was.... Peach... something.... Yuri sorta thought?

He wasn't totally sure, it was something that sounded like Peach, he was pretty sure

God, Yuri hated that Peach guy, he was always so fucking _peppy_ and _positive_, like there were rainbows pouring out of his orifices or something

Although......

He seemed to know an awfull lot about this place

Yuri remembered several of the times in the past few years when they had run into eachother in the hall or outside of the apartment building and Peach-whatever had tried to strike up a conversation, especially when he was new, he had said something about a guided tour....

"Hey! Uh.... Peach...?"

"Phichit!!!" the other man beamed, practically radiating pixie dust

_Gross_.....

"Y-Yeah uh, Phichit! Could you uh.... do me a favor?"

"Sure Yuri!! What is it?"

"Well, you seem like you know alot about this place.... and... how people end up in this place..."

"Oh yeah, I've been here for AGES, I really like learning so I've learned all sorts of stuff about-!"

"That's great, do you know where I could do some research?"

Phichit's eyes were practically _shinning_

"Oh I have _just_ the thing,"

~+~

Yuri let out a quiet, wimpering groan

He had never felt this horrible before

Not in all of his life- ... er... death? Life death?- in all of his _existence_, had he felt this terrible

He was a med student once for fuck's sake but even THAT looked like child's play compared to the shit he had just gone through

"Well Yuri," Viktor said with an exhausted sigh, crashing down into the large leather chair next to the operating table he had just been using

"I've looked under every last skin cell and can't find a single HINT of anything that may have ever done anything sinfull,"

"Gee," Yuri rasped weakly, his eyes flickering up towards the Prince Of Hell

"_No. SHIT._"

"W-Well you can't blame me for trying!!" Viktor huffed, placing a hand to his chest

"And besides, think about how disappointing this is for ME! My very first time experimenting with rehabilitating these fuck-ups and you're cleaner than a newborn kitten! It's _very_ disconcerting when you consider my job!"

"Your self-assigned job," Yuri pointed out, his voice still weak as his eyes flicked down to watch the blood- _his_ blood- continue to flow into the drain at the bottom of the table

...

Had he said "operating table" earlier?

He meant _autopsy table_

"W-Well yes! But that just makes it even harder for me!! I'm already out on a MAJOR limb trying this in the first place, nobody thinks I can do it! Not even Chris! He may be helping me but I know deep down that he doesn't actually believe I can do it!"

"....That's rough buddy," Yuri rasped quietly as he coughed up a small clump of blood and... what he really, _really_ hoped was vessels and not... _organs_.... **again**.....

"It IS! I'm the Prince Of Hell but I don't belong here, I don't even WANT to be here! But because my fucking FATHER-"

He paused, pursing his lips and staring down at the butchered looking soul laying on the table

He looked healed on the outside but.....

Viktor knew that meant jack shit when it came to the inside

He hadn't just decided to hack Yuri apart blindly after all

He had his own experiences that had helped guide his scalpel....

"I'm sorry," he said suddenly, quietly, standing up and moving over to the table, very gently placing a hand on Yuri's head and stroking his fingers through his hair

"I'm sorry.... you're suffering, aren't you?'

Yuri wanted to ask what gave it away, but he really didn't have the energy anymore

He wasn't sure he had the energy to even _breathe_ anymore

.....

Did he even technically _need_ to breathe...? Or was that just some sick _perk_....?

"Yuri... I'm so sorry that I hurt you.... I really thought I would find something, and then any pain I caused would have been deserved and on your way to recovering from your sins but.... obviously that isn't the case,"

"Uh-huh...."

Viktor's face was screwed up, gone was the heavy passion he had been experiencing during this entire ordeal, now he just looked.... _sad_....

"Please, let me heal you,"

"Heal me how...?"

"I can call in a favor," Viktor promised softly, continuing to stroke Yuri's hair absently before walking towards the wall behind them and grabbing the phone from the charger, starting to deal

"Mm.... Viktor... how are you dialing and still stroking my hair?" Yuri asked curiously

"That's my tail, darling," Viktor replied casually

Yuri hadn't been sure he could feel any worse, but oh, look at that....

Sure, _now_ he could tell the difference between the slender, long appendage sweeping through his hair and Viktor's warm hand, but....

"....Ofcourse it is....."

~+~

"Shit... shit shit shit SHIT!!!"

Yuri didn't know what the fuck he was going to do with this information

He had just finished reading through the "Damnable Offenses" section of the "Welcome To Heaven!" guidebook- ugh, he hated that it was called that... and that it existed... and that any of this was a thing...- and he did _not_ have good news

Apparently murder isn't quite as forgivable as he assumed it was

Sure, there were _some_ circumstances where it was..............

Just none that any of Yuri's fit into

Well, sometimes, he had killed out of self-defense quite a bit, but that was HARDLY the only reason and as it turns out, the _other_ reasons- like "for power" and "for money" and "for fun" and "because he pissed me off" didn't actually qualify as excusable reasons

_Apparently_ those were things that would get you damned until you reincarnated

So.....

Why was Yuri in Heaven?

He had been trying to figure that out all night, and so far he hadn't come to any conclusions

.....

But unfortunately, he knew someone who might have a clue...

Reluctantly, he heaved a sigh and tapped on the door across the hall from his own room and waited

"Yuri!! Hi!!!"

"Hey Phichit," he said with a sigh

"Listen uh.... do you have a minute?"

Oh gross, Phichit looked like he was going to BURST with joy

"For you? I have TEN minutes!"

.......

_Gross_.....

~+~

"Angel grace?" Yuri asked quietly, staring skeptically at the bottle in front of him and raising his eyebrows

"Yep, fair warning that it'll burn like a motherfucker on the way down, but trust me, you'll feel much better soon," Viktor promised

Yuri still didn't look like he really believed any of that, but he didn't argue any further, reaching out to carefully wrap his fingers around the shot glass that Chris had just poured the grace into and bringing it to his lip

His stomach was churning just looking at it but....

Figuring he really had nothing else to lose at this point, he tossed it back and-.....

_Oh_

**_OH_**.....

That was the most unbelievably warm, comforting sensation he had ever felt

It was like... like his mother wrapping her arms around him and giving him a hug, or... or hot chocolate on a frigid day or.... or the sensation of being snuggled with by a puppy....

It was so _incredible_....

"Well?" Viktor asked quietly, biting his lip, obviously a little hesitant to even believe that it had worked himself

Blinking, eyes clear and feeling better than he had in years, Yuri glanced up at Chris and pushed his glass forward

"Hit me again?"

~+~

"If someone ended up in Heaven by... _accident_? You mean like, dying before they were supposed to?"

"No, I mean... what if someone who belongs in Hell ended up here instead?"

Phichit shook his head slowly, a frown on his face

"I've never heard of anything that rediculous happening, sorry, I'm pretty sure there's no such thing,"

Yuri cursed under his breath, hanging his head in frustration

"Hey... why are you worried about it anyway? I mean, it isn't like that's the case with _you_ or anything,"

"How do you know that?" Yuri grumbled, rubbing his hands over his face

"What makes you so confident?"

"Well.... because I've met you, and you're a bit of an ass but... you're not like... _hell_ material... those people are almost irredeemable,"

Yuri paused at that, eyebrows raising slowly as he looked at Phichit over his shoulder

".....Almost? Why _almost_?"

"Well, because technically if you reincarnate and live a good life-"

"Yeah yeah I know about that shit but what about- .... are there other options? Another way to get redemption and earn your way into Heaven? No matter what you've done?"

"Well... _technically_, there is _one_ thing,"

"What is it?" Yuri asked immediately, wasting zero time

"Asking for forgiveness,"

.....

Yuri blinked, waiting for the punch-line, but... apparently there wasn't one....

Either that, or Phichit was wildly slow with telling jokes

"Excuse me...?"

"Yeah, if you repent- genuinely, no faking it- and seriously want to be a better person and ask for forgiveness... you'll be forgiven,"

"And this works _every_time? You're sure?"

"Everytime I've ever heard of,"

"Even after death!?"

"W-Well I don't know.... I mean that's never really... happened... to my knowledge...."

"But it's _possible_?"

"Yeah," Phichit agreed with a nod

"It's possible.... why?"

"Oh," Yuri said with a sigh of releif and a grin

"No reason~"

~+~

"So that Grace really didn't bother you at all?"

To say that Viktor was surprised was certainly putting that mildly

"Not even a little bit," Yuri agreed as he took one last shot of Grace and sighed softly in pleasure

He felt _so_ much better

So much, that Viktor's torture from earlier was almost worth it

....................

_ALMOST_

"Wow..... that's.... that's not normal...." Viktor said with a frown, eyes narrowed as he stared at the other man

"Is anything about me normal?" Yuri reasoned flatly

".....Point taken,"

Still, Viktor really hadn't expected him to go through half a bottle of Grace, it was a good thing Viktor was the prince and could afford it...

"I... really do want to apologize to you though Yuri, I mean it, I know that I was callous earlier but I didn't mean to be... I do care about you,"

"It's ok Viktor, I'm a job, I get it-"

"No, no you're much more than that!!" Viktor insisted, standing from his chair, a stern and serious look on his face, eyes narrowed as he stared down at the soul in front of him

"I mean... yes it started out that way but now... now I'm truly invested in helping you!! Your soul is so pure.. it HAS to be in order for you to take Grace without a burn, and I want to know why you're down here and help you get out because you clearly don't belong,"

Yuri was quiet for a few moments, staring down at his empty shot glass with a listless expression

"Viktor... you don't need to feel obli-"

"I don't," Viktor said seriously

"I want to help you Yuri, that's all there is to it," he said firmly, giving a long, low sigh and carefully hopping up onto the table next to Yuri, head hung and hands curled around the edge of the metal table

It was... weird...

From this perspective, Viktor looked alot more like a shy child than the Prince Of Hell....

"I know it's strange... I'm... I'm the Prince Of Hell, the demoniest of all demons, and yet I don't want to maim or torture or make anyone miserable, I just... want to help people, and live my own life..... maybe it's selfish of me to ever have thought that I could have something like that considering what I am but..."

"It isn't selfish," Yuri said quietly, reaching out to gently curl his fingers around Viktor's

"Viktor.... I don't think you have a selfish bone in your entire body, you're... a little misguided maybe, but not selfish," Yuri said softly

"I don't even understand how _you're_ down here to begin with either," he noted with a slight sigh

Though, for this one, Viktor had the answer ready and waiting to go

"That would be courtesy of dear old Dad," he replied with a loud sigh of frustration

"Satan has a habit of trying to manufacture the perfect heir, he's only fucked dozens of human women- some willing, others not- over the centuries and so far he keeps failing, he... finally decided with me that his error was allowing the child to grow up in the human world, at first he thought it was allowing them to be raised by their mothers, but after a few times of killing the mother early on and having them raised by a demon of his choice, he realized that wasn't it, it was the human realm that was causing the problem, not who was raising the kids.... atleast that's what he thought...."

"So he brought you down here and decided to raise you here," Yuri concluded with a small frown, a sympathetic look crossing his face

"Bingo,"

"So you.... you're forced to be here... even though you never did anything to deserve it...."

Wow, Yuri never thought he'd be identifying with the crazy, extra Prince Of Hell, but here he was, feeling like they were actually.... pretty close to understanding eachother.... like they could _relate_ to eachother....

"I mean, yeah, you could say that," Viktor muttered quietly, rubbing the back of his neck

"Well...... shit, I guess we're in the same boat, aren't we?"

"You could say that," Viktor agreed with a quiet chuckle, his expression warm and bittersweet

"Your soul could be so pure.... and it just... wouldn't even matter...?"

"Correct,"

Yuri narrowed his eyes, nose wrinkling as he hopped down from the table suddenly

"Viktor, I'm getting you out of here,"

.....

Well, Viktor didn't see that one coming

"Um-"

"And I'll accept no arguments! You don't deserve to be in this place any more than I do and I'm not going to let you suffer for things that aren't your fault!"

Viktor was quiet for a moment, before his demonic features came out in full force for a breif flash, beaming like a ring of hell fire as he jumped forward and gave Yuri a giant, tight hug, squeezing and snuggling up against him

"Oh Yuri... I'd call you a saint but that's a bit below the belt even for a demon, you're much more like... like.... a _puppy_!!"

Yuri couldn't say he entirely understood where Viktor was going with that, but whatever he said

"I'm glad you're happy Viktor," he said quietly, gently wrapping his arms around the demon in return

"Now let's find a way out of this hellhole,"

~+~

"WOW!!! I had no idea!!"

Yuri had never seen anything so beautifull in his entire life

The city full of lights and beautifull music that Otabek had brought him to was... _astounding_

It reminded him of what the tourist expectation of night life in New York was or something

It was just so gorgeous....

"And this is the part where I tell you that it would have paid to go to orientation," Otabek teased as he gently wrapped his fingers around Yuri's

"Y-Yeah I guess," he grumbled back quietly, face turning a light shade of pink as the angel started leading him through the city streets

"I've always been a rule-breaker though,"

"Mm, nothing wrong with that as long as the rules you're breaking aren't the important ones,"

"Right.... the important ones...." Yuri mumbled quietly, partly under his breath

"You know, the last time I was alive was during the fifties, I lived in America back then, and I had the greaser aesthetic going, motorcycle and gelled hair and everything,"

"Really?" Yuri asked with a small grin

"Yes, I was a 'bad boy' for a wile there, I was also a big protestor and environmental activist,"

"_Wow_," Yuri snorted

"So uh, is that what you've gotta do to be an angel? Be all.... activism and protesting and shit?"

"No, no, nothing like that, the biggest determining factor for becoming an angel is _wanting_ to be one,"

".....Really?"

"Really, you can't become an angel unless you want to be one,"

"'So if I just.... _decided_ that I wanted to be an angel... I'd sprout wings and that'd be it?"

"Well no, not exactly," Otabek chuckled back

"You'd still have to go through a fairly extensive training experience, much like with any job,"

"Oh," Yuri mumbled quietly

"Why? Are you thinking about wanting to be one?"

"M-Maybe.... um, angels... can't get kicked out of Heaven... can they?"

"Well no, not really, the fallen angel thing is one of the many parts of religion that humans completely misunderstood, in actuality, it has nothing to do with angels who fall from 'grace' and are turned into demons or anything rediculous like that, it's in reference to the fact that some angels _choose_ to incarnate into a human life from time to time for one reason or another, they 'fall' from Heaven to Earth into a mortal life,"

"Oh,"

_Oh_

So if Yuri became an angel too....

Then he could never be kicked out, wich meant he could stay with Otabek and that no matter what sins he had committed he apparently wouldn't be punished for them....

He wasn't sure if he could get kicked out as things were now but....

He'd rather not take any chances

"Why? Are you thinking of becoming an angel?" Otabek asked curiously, his lip quirked up into a small grin

"I might be," Yuri replied with a coy smile

"Yeah?" Otabek asked, coming to a pause suddenly and turning towards the blonde, reaching out to gently cup Yuri's face

"Yeah, just.... one little thing I should probably confirm first,"

"And that would be..?" the angel asked slowly, his thumb stroking slowly along Yuri's jawline

"Angels don't have to be virgins right?"

"Oh," Otabek laughed, grinning deviously as he leaned down and let their noses touch

"_Definitely not_,"

"Then in that case," Yuri breathed, leaning up and allowing their lips to touch, brushing together in the most sweet and... _chaste_... gesture Yuri had ever experienced

"Count me in,"

~+~

"You think it could be a clerical error? I... didn't even know that could be a _thing_,"

"It usually can't be," Viktor explained as he walked through the doors of the records office, Yuri trailing close behind him

"But I really can't imagine anything else that could _possibly_ account for this madness so.... once you've eliminated the impossible-"

"Then whatever is left, no matter how improbable, must be it?" Yuri asked with a soft smile

He couldn't believe Viktor was quoting Sherlock Hol-

"Er... I was going to say 'then you have to start looking at the really batshit INSANE impossible'.... but I like your version too!"

....

Oh well, somehow that fit better anyway

Shaking his head fondly, the little sinner followed Viktor as the demon prince opened the door to the office at the end of the hall, plastering a bright smile on his face

"Mila!! How's my favorite records keeper?"

"I guess that really depends on how big of a favor you're asking for this time Viktor," the red-haired beauty sitting at the desk in front of them- if being fully reclined with her legs propped up against the desk could be called "sitting", that is- replied with a small smirk

"A favor? Now why would you just assume that I'm here for a favor?"

"Because I know you," Mila snorted back, pushing away from the desk and grinning in Yuri's direction

"Oooh, and who's _this_ delightfull little morsel hm?"

"THIS.... is my favor," Viktor replied, wrapping an arm around Yuri's shoulders and yanking him against his side

"I need you to check the records and see what our little freind here did to get himself damned, or if he even did anything to get damned in the first place," Viktor explained

"Ah, I see.... another of those 'I don't think what I did was wrong' types hm?"

"No no, he really doesn't know, and neither do I, trust me Mila, I have stripped this boy of every skin cell and blood vessel and there's not a fucking CLUE to his crimes to be found,"

"Really?" Mila purred curiously, her bright green eyes flashing red for a breif moment as she leaned further across her desk, clearly interested

"Really, so.... can you help?"

Beaming, she leaned back in her chair and pushed away from the desk

"Let's see what I can do~ Now, I'm going to need the date, location, and cause of your death dear,"

Yuri fidgeted, attempting to keep his calm as he reflected back on quite literally the worst day of his life

"Um... I was in Detroit... it was September 29th, I... got shot in a.... someone shot up the club I was at...."

"Oh my darling..." Viktor breathed sympathetically, wrapping his arms around Yuri and giving him a soft, affectionate hug

"I'm so, so sorry that happened to you..."

"It's ok..."

"No, no it isn't, your shooter belongs here my darling, not you," he said with a loud sigh, resting his head against Yuri's shoulder

Yuri wondered breifly, as he reached up to gently pet Viktor's head, what the demon had expected his death to have been like

Yuri had died relatively young after all, the thought that it may have just been peaceful natural causes was pretty unlikely, but to be fair, perhaps Viktor had thought it had been an accident

He supposed the mass shooting thing _was_ pretty jarring...

Even for a demon, apparently

"Mmm, and your name is....?" Mila asked, scrolling through what looked like an iPad made up of flames

"U-Um, Yuri Katsuki,"

"Katsuki... Katsuki....... mmm nope, no Katsuki, are you _sure_ that's your name?"

Yuri's eyes narrowed, nose wrinkling

"...._Pretty_ sure yeah,"

"Ok ok, chill chill, I'm obligated to ask, you wouldn't believe how many people get so used to going by a nickname that they don't even remember their official name anymore, and sometimes people were born with different names too, you know, problems with legitimacy or a name that suddenly gets a bad connotation attached to it, I mean do you know how many Damiens, Hanse, and Donalds have gotten hastily renamed or nick-named over the years?"

"Can't say that I do, but I would imagine alot,"

"'Alot' is putting it pretty mildly,"

Yeah, Yuri didn't even want to ask....

"Anyway in part I ask because wile I don't see any Yuri _Katsuki_ listed here, I **do** see a Yuri _Plisetsky_ who died in the same place at the same time, same method and even the same age,"

Yuri felt... _cold_ at that information, and apparently he wasn't the only one

"You..... are you serious?" Viktor asked quietly

"Yep, serious,"

Exchanging glances, Yuri made note of just how hard and angry Viktor's expression was

Yuri was willing to bet that the two of them were having a pretty similar idea right about now

"Mila..... ring Heaven for me, tell them the prince needs an audience- **NOW**,"

~+~

"That was incredible," Yuri sighed softly as he shifted around in bed- the most comfortable bed he'd ever slept in, wich was really saying something considering not only the bed he typically slept in these days, but also the fact that his bed from life hadn't exactly been anything to sneeze at either

"I'm glad I'm not the only one thinking so," Otabek chuckled, shifting a little to give Yuri a light kiss, gently stroking his fingers down the side of his lover's face and trying not to laugh when he gave a little sigh of happy approval

"Oh fuck babe, I KNOW so, this.... this really _is_ Heaven,"

"Was there ever any doubt?"

Yuri shook his head, deciding not to say anything as he gave Otabek another kiss

"No, just.... it isn't the harps and butterfly gardens that make this paradise, it's..... you, as cheesy as it is to say that..."

"By all means Yura, cheese away,"

Yuri's expression softened, giving a long, quiet exhale as his features softened

"Yura...."

"Is that.. ok? It's just.. your last life was Russian right? That's where you got your name? So--"

"I love it," he interrupted quickly, reaching down to gently wrap his hands around Otabek's and give them a squeeze

"In fact I- .... please, call me only that from now on," he requested softly, taking Otabek's hands and squeezing them both

"Really?" Otabek smiled

"Really really, I... I really don't... like who I was when I was alive... I don't want to be him anymore... I don't want to be that angry, greedy, hate-filled person anymore.... Yuri Plisetsky is dead, long live Yura- ... do angels have last names?"

"We can if we want them, I use 'Altin',"

"Ok, long live Yura Altin,"

"Bold statement," Otabek grinned teasingly

"Pft, you love it," Yura insisted as he climbed on top of his boyfreind to straddle his lap

"Yeah," Otabek agreed, his hands moving down to find Yura's hips

"I do,"

~+~

"Heaven doesn't _make_ clerical errors,"

Yuri was still reeling from the fact Viktor had managed to just.... walk right into Heaven like it was no big deal, but apparently being a prince had the occasional perk

"Listen, _madame_," Viktor absolutely seethed, one hand still wrapped around Yuri's protectively, the other now firmly planted on the desk of the receptionist in front of them- Sara, according to her name tag

"I am telling you that Heaven is missing an angel and I have him right here for you, meanwile, YOU have absconded with one of my little demons in the making, and wile I don't particular care to have him back, I would figure that you don't want him in your midst, now just check your records, before I start to get angry,"

Although from anyone else's perspective, Viktor had been _angry_ since the second they walked through the gates

Hell, he'd been angry since they left Mila's office

"Ok Prince Viktor," Sara said with a sigh, clearly aiming to humor him as she snapped her fingers and manifested an iPad made out of light- a polar opposite and yet clearly similar version to Mila's

"Yuri Plisetsky you said?"

"Yep," Viktor replied, popping the "P"

Sara looked bored as she scrolled through her device, but then... her face turned to something of more interest, confused at first, before going pale with realization

"We...... have a Yuri _Katsuki_ listed for the date and location you specified...."

"And did a Yuri Katsuki ever actually register with you?" Viktor asked slowly

"N-No..... no no no, on .... on that same day Yuri Plisetsky......... _oh my god_....."

"Mmmmmmmmm, I hear 'clerical error'," Viktor hummed smugly, though he didn't sound like he was enjoying the situation, quite the opposite, he sounded like he detested it

"I-I'll call a supervisor," Sara said quickly, reaching out for the phone on her desk and dialing a few numbers

Viktor shook his head slowly, and if Yuri was guessing, he'd be willing to bet that the poor guy had a monstrous headache....

"Oh no, not you again," Yuri heard, turning around and seeing an older, balding man standing behind them

"I've told you a billion times Hellspawn, there's nothing you can do to get into Heaven, so go on Vitya, get out of here, go back to Hell where you belong,"

The tone didn't sound particularly malicious, more... _tired_ and exasperated....

But Yuri couldn't imagine how much those words must sting, even if they were said by someone who Viktor was familiar with- wich was obvious given the man's use of his diminutive

He said it as if Viktor was constantly one poorly planned Scooby Doo scheme away from trying to bust into Heaven and... that.... honestly fit pretty well with everything else Yuri knew about him

It was extremely sad to think about

"Ooh relax Yakov, I'm not here for me this time, you people made a mistake,"

"What? That's not possible, Heaven doesn't make mistakes,"

"Wow, what an ego!!" Viktor laughed

"I thought pride was considered a sin in alot of cultures,"

"It isn't pride, it's fact," Yakov replied with a roll of his eyes, approaching behind Sara to look at her screen, and then...

"Oh shit....."

"OOooh is that a MISTAKE I hear?" Viktor smirked

Yakov sighed quietly, grabbing the phone and starting to dial a few numbers himself

"I really don't know how this happened but I am SO sorry," Sara said immediately, a clearly devastated look on her face

"It isn't your fault," Viktor said with a shrug

"Clearly the computer is correct, it's the fault of whoever was on scene that day,"

Sara didn't look like that had made her feel any better though

A moment later, another woman appeared, dressed in a well-tailored suit and strutting towards them

"Hi, I'm Minako, I'll be handling your case,"

"Great, do I have to explain what happened _again_?" Viktor asked, eyebrows raised

"No no, Yakov filled me in," she replied as two more people appeared, one a woman a little younger looking than Minako, the other a man around the same age, both dressed entirely in black

"These are Yuko and Takeshi Nishigori, two of the Reapers attending to the situation that day," Minako introduced, and just as she said that, two more people- the _last_ two, Yuri was willing to bet- appeared

One was short and blonde and looked annoyed just to be there, and the other was clearly an angel, a little taller and sporting a pair of massive black wings

_Beautifull...._

"And this is the little bastard I take it," Viktor noted as he looked down at the blonde

"Excuse me?" the blonde growled back

"Viktor, this is Yuri Plisetsky and Otabek Altin, his boyfreind,"

"Pleasure to meet you," Viktor said dryly, clearly not at all meaning it

"....Right.... Minako, what's going on?" Otabek asked urgently

"Well it seems that there's been something of a mix up," Minako explained immediately

Good, atleast she wasn't beating around the bush

"See a few years ago both Heaven and Hell were expecting a Yuri from the same situation at the same time and it appears that somehow they got swapped," Minako said quickly

".... I.... didn't know that could happen...."

"Neither did we, and yet here we are, the computer doesn't lie," she explained

"Yuri Katsuki is meant to be here in Heaven, and Yuri Plisetsky belongs in Hell, sorry,"

That was certainly concise

"N-No, no way!!" Yuri (Plisetsky) shouted

"There is no way in Heaven or Hell that I'm finally starting to enjoy it here and now you're going to make me leave! No! NOT happening!"

"Well that isn't exactly what I said but yeah, yeah that's _exactly_ what's going to happen regardless," Viktor replied casually

"_No_-"

"Wait a moment," Minako said with a small sigh, pinching the bridge of her nose

"Technically, _I_ make the decisions regarding this matter,"

"I'd still like to know exactly what happened,"

"I remember that day," Yuko said quietly, rubbing her arm and looking down at the ground

"It was so chaotic.... there were dozens of souls to reap and everyone was so panicked and confused.... and it happened at the same time a tsunami was happening somewhere else... our forces were stretched thin and everyone was just trying to get through it the best they could.... I really am sorry, I... I guess we didn't bother double checking surnames, we each had a Yuri on our list and we didn't realize that at the time.... we both must have assumed there was only _one_..... Mr. Katsuki, Minako, I'm _so_ sorry... I can't possibly apologize enough,"

"It's ok, mistakes happen," Yuri smiled weakly, much to the bewilderment of Viktor, who looked like he very much wanted to protest the idea of this being "ok", but he kept his mouth shut for the time being

"So what I'm hearing," Yura said slowly

"Is that this is _your_ problem, this is on _you people_, wich means that reasonably, I shouldn't have to deal with the consequences,"

"That isn't how this works," Minako replied flatly, turning her attention to Yuri for the time being

"Mr. Katsuki, on behalf of Heaven, we truly apologize to you for all that you've been through, you will, ofcourse, be offered a place here in Heaven immediately, but we'd also like to offer you a wish, it's... the least we can do after literally putting you through hell over the past few years,"

"A.... wish....?" Yuri asked slowly, tilting his head

"Yes, it can be used for virtually anything you can imagine, use it wisely, wises aren't given out very often,"

"Or ever," Otabek said with a cough

"Well in fairness this sort of thing hasn't happened yet," Minako grumbled back under her breath

"It.... can really be anything?"

"Sure, as long as it isn't anything that would result in damnation or anything that would throw the universe off balance like wishing to become a god or something,"

Yuri nodded slowly, gently squeezing Viktor's hand before speaking up

"I.... I want Viktor to be allowed into Heaven,"

"Wait... _what_?" Viktor asked slowly

"Excuse me?" Yakov raised his brows

"You could wish for anything and you're using it on the literal prince of hell?" Takeshi snorted

"Y-Yes," Yuri said a bit more firmly

"I don't really need anything, I'm just happy to be here, but... but Viktor is the kindest soul I've ever met and he doesn't deserve to be in hell just because his dad is the devil,"

"Technically, that isn't why," Minako corrected

"We don't take parentage into consideration about this sort of thing, it's a little more complicated than that, other souls- _all_ other souls, aside from Viktor's- were either born in Heaven, or created anew on Earth and lived a human life, they've shown that they _belong_ in Heaven and aren't going to run around committing attrocities, but Viktor has never lived a human life, and he wasn't born here, the only thing we have to go by is his life in hell, wich, as I'm sure you noticed, operates quite a bit differently than we do, we can't quite judge him for how he's behaved there- the good _or_ the bad- as it wouldn't be an accurate idea of how he would behave _here_, that's why he hasn't been allowed into Heaven,"

Yuri looked down, biting his lip

"I.... I still want you to let him in here, that's my wish, he's so amazing, he's... he's kind and brave and generous and he... he really, honestly _cares_ about people, about.... _me_....... and I can't let him go back down there wile I stay here just because of circumstances that he can't control! So.... so if I get a wish.... then this is my wish,"

Minako was quiet for a moment, before giving a small nod

"Noted," she said simply, before turning her attention back to Yura

"And as for _you_, Yuri Plisetsky, for your sin-"

"I repent!" Yura shouted suddenly, wrapping his hand around Otabek's

Minako blinked in shock, looking as though she had just been slapped in the face

"I.. I repent for all of my sins and ask for forgiveness,"

"That only works if you mean it," Takeshi remarked

"Otherwise we'd have freaks like you up here all the time messing with the natural order, you can't just say 'forgive me' and-"

"I DO mean it," Yura insisted

"I know I.... I didn't exactly live a good life.... and if I could go back and relive it I would, but... but I can't, I can't change what I did, I can only change what I'm doing _now_, I can only change how I act _now_, and... and I HAVE changed, I don't want to be a murdering asshole anymore, I.... I want to be with Otabek, I want to be the person that Otabek thought I was,"

He paused, turning around and staring up at Otabek with a sullen expression on his face

"I'm sorry for that by the way, I didn't exactly lie to you but.... I wasn't exactly honest either, and I should have been, I'm... I'm sorry..."

He turned back to Minako, his expression genuine and regretfull

"I'm sorry for everything I did when I was alive, and I ask for forgiveness,"

"Well...... you certainly have put me in a bind," Minako said with a sigh

"No one has ever genuinely repented _after_ death before, that's usually just something they say when they realize they've screwed up and don't want to go to hell, but you..... there IS change happening in you, I can sense that,"

"Sooooooo........ I'm..... clear....?" Yura asked slowly

"Oh, no no, you still murdered a _bunch_ of people in cold blood," Minako said with a laugh, causing Yura to pout

"Granted the amount of _innocent_ lives you took wa slim to none, but you killed because you _liked_ it half the time, wich is not going to fly,"

"So then what the fuck!?" he growled

"I was just wondering the same thing," Viktor said slowly, wrapping his arm around Yuri's shoulders and squeezing a little

"I mean, not to rush you but... you didn't actually tell us if you were going to grant Yuri's wish or not,"

"I'm aware," Minako said, hopping up to sit on the edge of Sara's desk and exhaling slowly

"This is an extremely unusual situation- on _several_ levels, and an unusual problem calls for an unusual solution.... so I have a couple of propositions for all of you," she noted, raising her finger to point towards Yuri and Viktor

"For starters, I am willing to grant your wish, Mr. Katsuki, **but** on a few conditions,"

"What are they?" Yuri asked eagerly

"For starters, I really _can't_ let Viktor just make his home here in Heaven without some kind of proof that he's not going to be an unholy terror on our society, so if he wants in, he's going to have to live a mortal life for a wile, atleast twenty years,"

"Done!" Viktor shouted eagerly

"_You_ may be but _I'm_ not yet," Minako frowned, her attention still on Yuri

"I don't feel particularly good about shoving the literal Prince Of Hell into a mortal body and letting him run amuck either though, SO if this is going to work, he's going to need a babysitter, and that, Mr. Katsuki, will have to be you,"

"M-Me? W-Why me?" Yuri asked in confusion

"Well for one thing because you're the one requesting this madness and I don't particularly want to assign one of my own staff members to this, and for another thing, your soul is pure enough to handle it, you've always done well at living incredibly good lives- I had a peek at your records, nice job on the mortality front- so you can handle it, now with that being said... if you should decide that you no longer want to committ to that-"

"I do!" Yuri shouted immediately

"...Good..... but I meant _later_, you have to maintain atleast twenty years with him, and if you should decide you want to tap out early, you'll be perfectly allowed to do so.... but _he_ will be yanked out of the mortal realm with you, and there will _not_ be another chance, so in other words, still up for the challenge?"

"_Definitely_," Yuri insisted with determination

"Good, now as for _you_," she said, turning towards Yura

"I can't very well ignore that you've asked for forgiveness, it goes against our code, you're regretfull, you're changing, I can't send you to hell..... but I can't let you stay here in Heaven either, so I'll offer you a partial do-over, you're not starting from scratch, you'll have the same hang-ups and cell memory that you had in your last life, no clean slate.... but you'll start over, with a new identity, and a guardian angel,"

"Guardian angel?" Yura asked

"Yes, Mr. Altin, if you're up for it, you'll be taking the same position for Mr. Plisetsky that Mr. Katsuki is taking with Viktor, you'll watch his every action and make sure that he doesn't run off committing more atrocities, the twenty year thing sticks for you too, by the way, so-"

"Count me in," Otabek said immediately, earning a bright, relieved smile from Yura

"Really?"

"Really," Otabek said seriously, taking the blonde's hand

"I... can't say that I'm happy with what you did in your last life... but you're a different person now and I believe in forgiveness, and I.... _I **like** you_, Yura, I want to stay with you and I want you to stay here with me so... if I have to have a mortal life for two or three decades, then I think that's more than worth it,"

Yura exhaled slowly, shakily, a genuine smile coming across his face as he reached up to cup Otabek's face

"Then-"

"Before you agree," Minako said suddenly

"There is one other stipulation- you aren't going to have any memory of any of this,"

That gave Yura pause, the colo draining from his face as he turned around to face her

".....What...?"

"You're starting over- in EVERY way, you'll have a life that we choose to put you in, and slowly you'll start to gain memories- fake memories- about it, but this? You won't remember any of this,"

"Why the fuck not!?"

"Because this is a TEST, ofcourse if you know the stakes you'll be more carefull, the goal isn't to find out how well you can suppress your natural Little Bitchness, it's to see if you can be a good person who's genuinely sorry and can do better compared to last time, if you remember, it'll be sort of pointless,"

"But THEY get to remember!!!"

"Yes, well, Mr. Katsuki _needs_ to remember so he won't forget his obligation, and even if we _could_ alter the memories of demons- wich we can't- Viktor wouldn't need a memory wipe in the first place, he's half demon and has never been mortal before, his trial will be more about controlling his sadistic instincts rather than if he consciously _wants_ to be good or not, we already know that he does,"

"Do you even _have_ sadistic instincts?" Yuri wispered to his freind, earning a shrug in reply

"I mean I _did_ torture you for hours yesterday and didn't feel bad about it until I realized that it had only hurt you and not helped you, so..... ish....? Sadism... but only for the sake of helping....?"

"I'm not sure that's a thing Viktor..."

"Then you've never had good sex," Viktor snickered

Yuri, who had died a fucking _virgin_, just blanched and cleared his throat

"M-More important things in front of us here, let's talk about that some other time,"

Or never, never would also be good

"So I'll forget Beka? I'll forget the entire reason I'm doing this shit?! ....Er.... the.... biggest.... reason... I mean...."

Minako was atleast kind enough to ignore his little slip

"You'll remember a version of him- the version meant for your mortal life, the mortal identity he takes on- slowly over time,"

Yura's jaw was tense, his expression... hesitant

"This is my only option, isn't it?"

"This or hell,"

Sighing loudly, his shoulders sagged and he squeezed Otabek's hand again

"Then I guess... sign me up for the redemption tour,"

Minako grinned, snapping her fingers as a pen and a few scrolls of papper appeared in her hand

"In that case, sign away, and prepare to live again,"

~+~

Groaning quietly, the blonde shifted in bed, his bright green eyes sliding open as he winced and tried to ignore the pain of the lights hitting his corneas

"Damn..." he breathed

Where... was he?

It looked like a hospital room, but he didn't remember how he had gotten there

Though, he supposed, in fairness, he couldn't remember.... _anything_.... when he really thought about it

"Ah, you're finally awake,"

Looking to the door, his suspicions of being in a hospital were virtually confirmed by the man in the lab coat standing in the doorway

"Hi, I'm Dr. Katsuki, I've been attending you the last few days,"

....Days...?

Sitting up slowly, he put a hand to his throbbing head, his eyes trained on the doctor

"How long-...? What.... what happened?" he asked with a quiet sigh

"You were in a car accident, you hit your head pretty hard but otherwise you're alright, do you remember anything about it?"

Pursing his lips, the blonde's shoulders sagged, shaking his head slowly

"I don't remember anything.... about the wreck or.... fuck... I don't remember _anything_...."

"Amnesia, don't worry, you don't have any serious damage so it's probably temporary, things will start coming back to you soon, and I think I know the perfect way to get them started,"

"Oh you do huh?" the blonde sighed softly

"Yeah, your boyfreind is here,"

Dr. Katsuki looked... weirdly pleased with himself for delivering that information, before stepping out of the room fully

Within seconds though, someone else was there to take his place

A beautifull man in a leather jacket, holding a big bouqet of daffodils, who was smiling as if he had just seen the most beautifull sight in the universe

"Welcome back to the world of the living sweetheart," he greeted, stepping into the room and handing the flowers to the smaller man

"Dr. Katsuki said your memory isn't with you for the moment, so... please, ask me whatever you need to know,"

"You're my boyfreind?" the blonde asked immediately, grinning as he leaned down and inhaled the scent of the flowers

"I am," the brunette replied, sitting on the edge of the bed

"I'm Otabek,"

"Otabek...." the other repeated slowly

"You can call me Beka if you'd like,"

Nodding slowly, the smaller man glanced up, a warm smile on his face

"Ok Beka, what's _my_ name then?"

"Your name is Yura,"

"Yura.... huh?" Yura asked softly, still grinning, his expression soft as he leaned his head against Otabek's shoulder

"I think I like that name,"

~+~

"Hi babe!!! Are you ready for lunch?"

Yuri smiled affectionately over his shoulder as he turned away from the clipboard he had been looking down at

"Almost, I just have to wait on Dr. Iglesia to double check something for me,"

He would never stop being thankfull that Minako had altered his memories so that, instead of being a med student, he now had enough knowledge to be a full-fledged doctor

She had given them all new lives and new identities, altering what she had to in order to make them fit in, raising his and Yura's bodies from the dead and healing them to be as good as new wile giving Viktor and Otabek brand new vessels to inhabit

It was like a dream, the way he had been able to just.... wake up one morning and start a brand new life...

It was _incredible_

"Mmmm, ok, will he be here soon? I'm starving, I'm _so_ ready for lunch," Viktor sighed, wrapping his arms around Yuri's waist and resting his head on his shoulder

"He should be," Yuri hummed back, laughing a little at how affectionate and snuggly his boyfreind- because _that_ was a development that had happened almost immediately- was

"Thank goodness!" Viktor sighed

"And how has your work been going today?" Yuri snickered, Viktor's head jerking up excitedly, his expression bright and beaming, Yuri could even see little hints of his demon nature in his face- something Viktor had been trying to control but had yet to perfect

"It's been great!!! Turns out? I'm an amazing therapist! I know Minako helped arrange my mind a little for that but seriously!! I made this girl cry today and she THANKED me for it! Isn't that amazing Yuri!? I'm helping! I'm making a difference!"

"Viktor you've been at this for three days...."

"And that's three days of progress!!"

Yuri chuckled a little, his expression warm as he turned around and cupped Viktor's face, giving him a soft kiss

"Yes sweetheart, it is," he agreed giving Viktor a soft, loving kiss

Unfortunately, the kiss didn't last very long, within seconds, Viktor's phone was ringing- specifically, the phone linked to the hotel

"Oh!" he chirpped with excitement, eyes flashing red as he grabbed the cellular device and quickly answered the video call

"Chris!!! How are you my freind!?"

Chris..... looked _tired_

_"About as good as I **can** be for someone who's about to open a hotel to reform sinners into good little souls, the little angel with all the hamsters has moved in, he's decided to stay here permenantely to help with this redemption thing,"_

"Really? That sounds great! You really like him right?"

_"..........Maaaaybeeee....... anyway, I called for a reason Vitya, I wanted to ask what your advice is for someone who's new to the torture game, I've never done this before you know,"_

"Oh, really?" Viktor asked with slight surprise, glancing up breifly as he noticed Yuri handing his clipboard off to another doctor

He was assuming that was the one his boyfreind had been waiting for

"Listen Chris, I'll call you back in a couple of hours ok? Yuri and I have a lunch date, and this will take some time to answer, especially as I doubt you'd exactly be willing to just use BDSM style techniques on everyone,"

_"Vitya, if you don't think I'd be eager to do **exactly that** then you don't know me at all,"_

Viktor laughed a little, watching the other doctor leave, Yuri put his clipboard down at the nurse's station, and....

"Ok Chris I'll talk to you soon, promise, see you, goodbye!!!" he said quickly, hurrying to end the call and put his phone away, taking Yuri's hands and sighing dreamily as he stared down into his lover's eyes

"Ready to go my love?"

"Yeah," Yuri agreed, curling his fingers around Viktor's

"I'll go anywhere with you Viktor,"


End file.
